JORDAN YEAR
Journal Entry
THOUGHTS™️
04–21–2021
︎ Writer: Stew Caldo
The new wisdom I've gained is kind of similar to getting tattoos lately. I've always gotten tattoos (over the past couple years), just as I've always experience relational conflict and pain (Moments of crisis). When I first started getting tattoos, it was the worst pain I had ever encountered. In the same regard, when I first experienced crisis, like with [REDACTED] in 2019, it was the hardest emotional trauma I had to move past. Now that my arms are all filled, I've moved on to my chest, stomach, and back. The pain of getting the eagle tattoo a couple years ago was bad enough to make me not want anymore tattoos. Now, I can sit through a stomach session and hand session no problem. Now that I've experienced the pain of having someone so close to me [REDACTED], I no longer fear small problems in my day to day. I'm constantly reminded of the bigger pain, the bigger trauma I suffered. I get through life and I realize that it's a waste to not enjoy every moment.
Sitting and writing that really makes me understand the growth of 23. I've learned to truly love life at any point in time. During the work days, or the weekends. During times of crisis, or times of bountiful joy. It's funny that in the past, I often found myself just as troubled in times of surreal joy as I did in times of crisis – mainly just because I was fearful of when it would end. Now, I don't question what's next or what could go wrong. I live, enjoy, and move on.
I'm so thankful for this year, this pandemic, these struggles, this wealth and abundance of social validation. All of it has brought so much growth. I feel that I'm turning 24 with less weight and less stress than I did with 23. I'm taking time to learn more about myself and my true needs, as well as listen to the needs of those around me.
23 was truly my Jordan year – I brought on so many new accomplishments and a new level of success I never thought I'd reach. But with that also came a tireless experiences of humility, doubt, and self-proclaimed failure. I didn't feel enough throughout it all, but as I'm near the end, I realize how successful and full of wealth I really am. I'm the best at being myself that I've ever been. Thank you for 23 God, I know everything was with purpose and intentionality. I look forward to the growth and challenges of 24