PEACE AND QUIET
Journal Entry
THOUGHTS™
08–29–2022
︎ Writer: Stew Caldo
6AM in Athens.
I think an essential part of traveling (and incurring jet lag from the change of timezones) is journaling.
I felt it was extremely grounding in London.
But Greece feels different. Less overwhelming. I don't feel tied to anything going on back home. I feel fully able to experience this, and respond to what happens around me.
I had dinner at a small cafe last night near our hotel in Acropolis. I wish I could pronounce it, or even write it, but the greek alphabet is still strange and foreign. Funny enough, I still try to annunciate all the characters in my head based off what english alphabet letter they somewhat resemble.
I've been really happy the past few weeks. My first acknowledgement would be taking my Adderall more regularly. I feel like my brain has been operating as it should. Which leads to me feeling free to do anything. Which inevitably leads to temporary happiness. So note number one is Adderall.
And maybe note number two is a byproduct of note number one – but I've also been feeling more attached to my heart and soul than I ever have in the past 2 years. I feel like I'm listening clearly to the direction my soul wants to take. At work, I'm genuinely not pursuing tasks, clients, or work that doesn't interest me. In life, I'm realizing that the moments I used to rush through are the ones I remember fondest. Like shooting with Phi. It used to feel like work, or like a chore. But now, I prepare my entire day around it. I look forward to the creative concepts. I look forward to approaching all of it like a child. Whereas, in the past, everything felt rigid.
This feels like huge growth for me. I've been slowing down to learn from those around me. Mostly the uncommon choices. [REDACTED] for example: I have no idea of his accolades, or where he's at in life. To me, he's just a strange [REDACTED] DP I happened to work with. But, when working together, I took in his inspiration for each shot. How money didn't matter. There are others like him as well. [REDACTED] saw the world with fresh eyes too. [REDACTED]’s lust for life inspired me.
Sometimes it's hard to have perspective in a new place. It's hard to look at all this in front of me, and remind myself that I sat at a desk two months ago and dreamed of this moment. It's hard to understand how to take that in. How do you enjoy a moment without letting it pass you too quickly.
I think it's all just patience and slowing down.
I can't wait for the first coffee I have with breakfast this morning. It's waiting for me on the rooftop right now.
I'm sitting on the balcony of our hotel. Everything is made of the most ancient, beautiful stone texture. Marble, lime stone, and many others I can't recite that quickly. The chair I'm in is no doubt hundreds of years old. The white top coat is chipping off, revealing an olive green patina texture underneath.
In front of me is a lush forest of trees and bushes. The plants here look different. The normal sky's blue is a different hue here. Everything is just a bit lighter and more muted.
Just above the forest, I see the Parthenon sticking out. The oldest city in the world, and I'm just sitting right here writing about my coffee.
[REDACTED]. Give me fresh eyes.